Horoscopes

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Here’s a word of caution: Before you go and cut down a Christmas tree for your room, make sure to measure your door. Good luck trying to fit that 8-foot-tall tree in your living room.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) You’d think that with only three weeks left in the semester you would know where your classes are, right? Wrong. Tomorrow’s trip through the labyrinth that is Tolentine will take a lot longer than expected.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Remember how you invited 70 people to party in your tiny apartment this weekend? Oh yeah, about that …

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) End-of-the-year formal season is now upon us. Get ready by buying new shoes, getting a haircut and stocking up on Gatorade.

Aries (March 21-April 19) We know you’re pressed for time with seven papers crammed into the next two weeks, but making Wikipedia your new best friend is not the best move.

Taurus (April 20-May 20) It’s probably about time to give your room that once-a-semester cleaning you’ve been thinking about for a while. Having to wade through the trash just to find your bed is not a good routine.

Gemini (May 21-June 21) Get ready for love. This weekend you will finally find your knight in shining armor … or in this case, your ‘Nova guy in a popped polo.

Cancer (June 22-July 22) Congratulations! That job offer finally came in! The only problem is that you will now come down with the worst case of senioritis known to man.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) Good idea: frolicking in the snow while you were home. Bad idea: frolicking in the snow while wearing flip-flips so that you catch pneumonia.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Remember when your mom offered to show you how to cook a turkey and you said no? Poor life decision. Now you will be thrust into the real world and won’t have the most important life skill!

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) You will celebrate the looming end of this semester with an ’80s-themed party, complete with “Flashdance” clothes, jerry curls and Flock of Seagulls hairdos.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Show up your Libra neighbors by having your own ’80s party – an 1880s party, that is! Break out the phonographs and prepare to get malaria!