Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Your birthday is approaching but rather than having a typical 21st birthday party, the stars feel that you should opt for an alternative celebration. Look to celebrate your birthday on the court rather than at the bar.

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

The stars want you to know that expecting a snow day every week is unrealistic.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Do you find yourself with a mind full of ideas and no where to put them? Start a blog

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

The stars foresee a visit from an unusual stranger in the near future.

Gemini (May 21-June 21)

The stars understand your need for drastic change, but growing dreadlocks in order to emulate your favorite rapper is over the top. Try a new pair of impractical sunglasses instead.

Cancer (Jun 22-July 22)

You probably should not have followed Bruce Springsteen’s commands during his half time show at the Super Bowl. The stars want you to know that you don’t have to drop your guacamole just because “The Boss” told you to.

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

The stars swear that they appreciate your optimism, but, seriously. Quit it.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Your sighting of Jay Wright at Flip and Bailey’s celebrating James Joyce’s birthday has inspired you to get into the Irish writer. The stars see failure in your future attempt at “Ulysses.”

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

The stars would like you to tone down your hatred. Seeking vengeance during social outings will lead to a loss of friends.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Your recent illness has left you bedridden and voiceless. The stars see a comeback in your near future.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

With Valentine’s Day approaching, you are feeling the need for companionship. The stars would like you to know that although the Corner Grille is a great place to eat, no one appreciates your attempts to pick up members of the opposite sex there.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Your attempts at humor were not appreciated by the audience, but the stars want you to know that they laughed.