Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Step very carefully as you walk across campus this weekend. You do not want to be that person who bites it in front of an enormous tour.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) Like cats? Like funny sayings? Like cats and funny saying together? Of course you do, and this week you will spend hours enraptured by LOLcats. I can has cheezburger?

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) This week, seize opportunities to be spontaneous. Methodically study for final exams? – No way! Weekend road trip to the Museum of Bad Art in Massachusetts? – Definitely!

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20) Make sure to keep a tight grip on your car keys this weekend. If not, you’ll go back to your car to find the windows down and a stranger’s shirt mysteriously draped on the passenger’s seat.

Aries (March 21-April 19) The worries of your life weighing you down? Just play some Journey and say, “Who cares? Journey’s on!”

Taurus (April 20-May 20) OK – the Soulja Boy phenomenon has gone on long enough. You know it’s bad when the entire bar does the dance in perfect synchronized motion.

Gemini (May 21-June 21) Pursue that childhood dream you gave up on. It’s never too late to join the circus and become that clown that gets fired out of a cannon.

Cancer (Jun 22-July 22) You will realize how sadly out of shape you are when your thighs hurt for days from all the dancing you did at a formal. Who knew bustin’ a move was such a workout?

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) You had so much fun posing for all those pictures at a party last weekend, but receiving the e-mail that said you’d been tagged in 187 pictures will not be so enjoyable. And the de-tagging begins …

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Filled with frustration? Take out your anger by punching your favorite stuffed animal – just make sure to apologize to Winnie the Pooh afterward.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Note to self: don’t tell the gossip columnist anything during happy hour. Things will only go downhill from there.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Reassess your hairstyle. You don’t want to be the girl who everyone thinks needs to take a shower.