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Sof gives her insight on how to approach Thanksgiving.

It’s time America starts being honest and admits that Thanksgiving is the most boring holiday. For a holiday with “giving” in its name, it’s funny that it quite literally gives nothing. There is nothing fun about Thanksgiving. 

It doesn’t have presents or fireworks or costumes. All you get is dry food and a football game. It doesn’t even deserve the title of holiday. It’s literally just a normal Thursday but with cranberry sauce. 

But not this year. I refuse to have yet another boring Thanksgiving. Luckily, there is one saving grace of Thanksgiving, and it is family drama. This Thanksgiving, it’s time for families to do what they do best: fight.

I want my Thanksgiving to be an exact replica of that scene in Gossip Girl when they all stormed out of the Thanksgiving feast. I want fights. I want judgment. I want all the drama that could be packed into one otherwise boring and gross food-filled day.

In order to add some drama to the day, I have compiled a list of what I like to call “Conflict Starters.” I will be using these conflict starters to bring some life to my Thanksgiving festivities this year, and I suggest all of you do, as well. 

I can confirm that some of them will work. I have watched a few of these questions blow up family events, and they are some of my favorite memories. I mean, it wasn’t great for the people fighting, but as someone who got to watch the drama unfold, I had an absolute ball. 

With that being said, I do know how to use these responsibly. By that I mean that I don’t care if saying any of these things gets me in hot water or causes my family to explode. If you are a little nervous about that, then please use them with caution. 

I suggest you don’t, though. If there’s no risk, there’s no reward. If you want to have fun on Thanksgiving, you’re just going to have to deal with the consequences. So please, use any (or all) of these Thanksgiving conflict starters to bring some life to your Thanksgiving festivities this year.

1.     Is a hot dog a sandwich?
2.     Who here was Team Captain America and who was Team Iron Man?
3.     Oh, you didn’t get any sleep the night of the election. Was it because you were too nervous or too excited?
4.     I don’t know if outer space is real.
5.     Who is genuinely more talented: Lebron James or Michael Jordan?
6.     Did you know what a tariff was two weeks ago? Do you know what one is now?
7.     How do you feel about teams having to change their insensitive names?
8.     Who is the most annoying member of the family?
9.     Okay, well, who would be in your cabinet if you were the president?
10. I’m pretty sure Sabrina Carpenter lip syncs.
11. Would you rather have a living daughter or an inexpensive carton of eggs?
12. If you could only save one person in this room from a burning building, who would you choose?
13. What are your thoughts on Ozempic?
14. When is it okay to cause an insurrection?
15. Who is really to blame for the Beatles breaking up?
16. How many transgender athletes are on your daughter’s basketball team?
17. Which is the correct way: toilet paper over or toilet paper under?
18. Maybe the Phillies really should trade Alec Bohm.
19. Do you really think there is a heaven, or are you just scared there isn’t one?
20. I think the Star Wars prequels are better than the originals.
21. When did you get your first and last COVID shot?
22. Should people with previous dance experience be allowed to compete on Dancing with the Stars?
23. Do you believe in the death penalty?
24. Just tell me why you thought it was a good idea to vote for them.
25. Let’s get serious here. Who is your favorite child and why?