The following content is purely satirical. Don’t believe everything you read.
If you could go to dinner with anyone–dead, alive or fictional–who would it be? Anyone. Historical figure, celebrity, family member. You pick.
We all know this question. It’s a classic ice breaker. Like all ice breakers, it tells you nothing about the person. You get nothing from it.
I think we can tweak this question to be more applicable to Villanova and our current situation. That is why I did a survey around campus asking a similar, but way more important question.
I know that technically the school already answered this question because they actually picked the person, but this isn’t about the real answer. This is about who you would pick if you were asked the following question:
If you could pick anyone–dead, alive or fictional– to be Villanova’s new men’s basketball coach, who would it be?
Here are some of the answers I got.
Jay Wright
I felt as though this answer was too simple. Too easy. You can’t repeat the past. Plus, there is no way he would want to come back.
Sam Barry
Again, this one feels like a pretty basic answer. Like, been there, done that. We already know he’s a great coach. He’s so great that he’s in the Hall of Fame and all that.
With that being said, I do think it would be fun to have a ghost as a coach. I did say that the answer could be a dead person, but this was the only dead guy answer I got.
Plus, the whole triangle thing is cool.
Bugs Bunny (“Space Jam,” specifically)
Technically, I didn’t ask for a human, so this is a fair answer. I’ve only seen the original “Space Jam,” but to my knowledge, Bugs Bunny was an excellent leader and player. I think he would bring greatness to our program.
I also just think it would be really cool to get involved in an intergalactic basketball battle with aliens. It would make Wells games even better.
The ‘Nova Knicks
Now, I actually got Brunson, Hart, Bridges and DiVincenzo as individual answers. I have no doubt that they would all do a great job coaching on their own.
I just think that we need their powers together, similar to the Avengers. They’re all great on their own, but I think they are only at their highest potential when they are together.
Even if the Knicks and Timberwolves don’t agree with me.
Troy Bolton (High School Musical)
This is a complicated pick. Troy did end up going for a life of both basketball and music. While some might think that this is valuable, others might say that it just means he can’t make up his mind.
I have no doubt that Troy would make an excellent basketball coach, but who’s to say he wouldn’t end up leaving for a role on Broadway? He’s a flight risk.
Ted Lasso/Jason Sudeikis
I got both of these answers, and I figured it was only fair to include both.
Of course, we have all heard the news about Ted Lasso coaching a new team in season four. Yes, the news did say it was a women’s soccer team, but there’s no proof that season four isn’t about Ted coming to Villanova.
Also, Lasso’s portrayer, Jason Sudeikis, is a huge basketball fan. He mostly only cares about women’s sports, but I’m sure he would take one for the team. Literally.
A Man with Hair
Villanova students agree that it’s odd (not bad, just odd) that our last coach was bald and now our new coach is bald. It’s just a concern. We didn’t do a great job with a bald coach, so why would we hire another bald coach?
It might be the lack of hair that is holding us back, and students are concerned. All I’m saying is that Jay Wright had hair.
A Woman
I got a lot of female answers.
Kylie Kelce, Caitlin Clark, Diana Taurasi, Simone Biles, Serena Williams, Denise Dillon. The list goes on and on. And on. Seriously, there are so many women who could coach this team, and the students on this campus agree.
I would love to talk about each and every single one of them, but I think it is most important to talk about their one commonality. They are women.
Really, the student body does not care which woman becomes the next coach. They just want her to be a woman.
We’re not saying that we’d definitely have a better outcome if our coach was a woman. We’re simply saying that we didn’t have a great one with a man.
Why not mix it up?
For the record, I do think we would do better if we had a female coach. Like, I fully believe that.
