The Villanovan Astrologer

Brett Klein

♒  Aquarius (Jan. 21 – Feb. 19)


When there’s powder this fluffy, it would be a crime not to make snow angels. Get out there and flap your wings. 


♓ Pisces (Feb. 20 – March 20) 

Even though the snow day likely pushed back all of your papers and tests, try to get ahead on them. Otherwise they’ll creep up on you and you’ll be just as lost as you were Monday night. They’re traps, snow days are. Traps. 


♈ Aries (March 21 – April 20)


Things never begin to be accomplished until they are started. Procrastination because of fear doesn’t get you anywhere except further away from your goal.  



♉ Taurus (April 21 – May 21)

If you’re not sure what to make of those dreams you’ve been having…neither am I. Maybe you should listen or maybe you should ignore them, who knows. 

Just pick one, I guess. 


♊ Gemini (May 22 – June 22)

Pain beats regret every day of the week and twice on Sundays. But aren’t they often the same thing? 


 ♋ Cancer (June 23 – July 23)


Just like Darrun Hilliard, you’re money in the clutch. With that being said, don’t leave your work until the last minute because Arch won’t be there to hit you with a pass for a wide-open three. 


♌ Leo (July 24 – Aug. 23)

Leo, where do you go from here? You should probably just live your life and stop thinking so much. March Madness is coming, though, so there’s that. 


♍ Virgo (Aug. 24 – Sept. 23)


Although the snow is blinding, just put on your sunglasses and block out all the haters. In the words of Millard Fillmore, “I can’t hear you. I’m the boss, son.” 


♎ Libra (Sept. 24 – Oct. 23)

Coffee picks you up and it calms you down. It’s that lifeblood that fuels the dreams of champions. Keep it up, Holy Grounds. 


♏ Scorpio (Oct. 24 – Nov. 22) 

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A lot more than you could, that’s for sure. 


♐ Sagittarius (Nov. 23 – Dec. 21)

Set multiple alarms for your 8:30. One will not do the trick, I know from experience. There’s something to be said for getting up early. The early bird gets the worm, as they say. 


♑ Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 20)

Did you know the bell sounds that come from Corr Hall aren’t actually bells? It’s just a recording. Keep a lookout for other fakes in your life.