“I am so tired.” “It is so hot outside.” “I need it to be Friday.” “This day is endless.”
These words are familiar, mundane, almost automatic and resound throughout Villanova’s shared campus spaces. Beneath the surface of these seemingly innocent complaints lies a deeper issue, namely that even on the most beautiful days, when the sun shines and the world feels vibrant, negativity and superficiality still dominate our conversations. I call these “cheap” sayings. They are short, dismissive and often devoid of genuine meaning, despite the hefty “tax” they take on our relationships and mental well-being.
These trivialities that fill our modern discourse drain our energy and “cheapen” our connections. They serve little purpose beyond filling silence, and are their own form of avoidance of authentic engagement. This, I believe, is the greatest conversation problem plaguing our campus and, increasingly, our generation at-large: we are so obsessed with “connecting,” that we have forgotten how to truly talk to one another.
This dilemma doesn’t confine itself to our face-to-face interactions but extends into the digital realm, where social media platforms like Instagram are filled with hollow affirmations of “I love you” and “You’re the best” posted on images of acquaintances we don’t know the middle names of. When did proclamations of love and friendship become the prelude to genuine bonds? When did words lose their weight? The superficiality of such public affirmations often masks a deeper disconnect, the very essence of our campus conversation problem.
I don’t mean to paint this as a solely campus-specific problem. In my opinion, it’s a generational crisis. According to a recent report in The New York Post, 74 percent of employees struggle with talking to coworkers casually. The rise of hybrid work models and automated messaging systems has replaced what was once lively “office chitchat” with sterile, impersonal, and often automated exchanges. As a result, many conversations revolve around complaints, the weather or how little sleep we had, all trivialities that do little to foster genuine connection or understanding.
This decline in authentic conversation feeds a cycle of superficiality, fueling loneliness and disconnection even in crowded rooms and online feeds. It’s a paradox of modern life: we are more “connected” than ever, yet many feel more isolated than ever before. The solution isn’t to eliminate social media or cease casual conversations but to elevate them, prioritizing authenticity over superficiality.
Ironically, I’ve spent the bulk of this editorial criticizing our culture of superficial complaints and meaningless chatter. To avoid sanctimonious preaching, let me suggest a few ways we can begin to repair this broken dialogue.
First, we must become mindful of the “cheap” talk we accept and propagate daily. Are we gossiping simply to pass the time? Agreeing just to avoid confrontation or silence? And perhaps most importantly, are we willing to confront whether silence is worse than the risk of authenticity?
If your answer to any of the first questions is “yes,” and to the last question is “no,” then it’s time to reevaluate the true cost of our casual conversations. We need to “add tax” in order to invest genuine effort into our interactions rather than letting superficiality become the currency of our social exchanges.
Moving beyond surface-level interactions isn’t just a personal benefit. It is vital for our professional lives as well. In an age where credentials are plentiful and competition fierce, the ability to hold a genuine, engaging conversation is increasingly rare and as a result, increasingly valuable. Employers don’t just look for degrees and certifications. They look for authenticity, communication skills and the capacity to connect meaningfully with colleagues and clients alike. We live in a time where it is both simultaneously easier and harder than ever to impress. Utilize conversational quality to your advantage.
In the end, reclaiming meaningful dialogue requires intention. It demands that we resist the urge to fill our “awkward” minutes with hollow platitudes or fleeting likes, but rather cultivate relationships through careful deliberation. Let’s recognize the true cost of our “cheap” discourse and commit to a higher standard, both on campus and beyond. Our relationships, personal wellbeing and professional futures depend on it.
