The following content is purely satirical. Don’t believe everything you read!

Happy Women’s History Month. I think this month is a very important time to remember that all women are really just girls at the end of the day, and March is the time to cut them some slack. Let a girl live. 

So, in honor of this wonderful month, I’d like to share 10 things that people should allow me and all women to do this month without any ridicule or judgment. Ladies, feel free to add whatever else is necessary to this list so you have a wonderful month. 

1. I’m just a girl, let me rot in bed. If I don’t have any responsibilities, and there are no emergencies, I will be on my phone in bed, and that is something you should respect. 
2. I’m just a girl, let me have ice cream for dinner. This is especially important if you see me eating the soft serve at Spit before I eat an actual meal. I’m going to need you to look away.
3. I’m just a girl, let me cry while I do my homework. Listen, I can’t speak for all the girls who go here, but I know I’m stressed right now. So, if I need to cry in the library while studying for my chemistry exam, you’re going to need to let me. It’s the only thing getting me through. 
4. I’m just a girl, let me watch Grey’s Anatomy’s Season 20 in peace. I know it’s bad, and I know it should’ve been canceled years ago. But, please, it’s all I have. Let me watch my bad medical drama and get some entertainment. 
5. I’m just a girl, let me blast Noah Kahan’s music in the shower. There is nothing wrong with listening to Noah Kahan at full volume any month of the year, but especially this month. If you hear him screaming the words to “Paul Revere” in the hallway, don’t complain to the RA.
6. I’m just a girl, let me say something incorrect sometimes. I will preface by saying that I am literally never wrong, so if you hear me say something wrong, shut up. That’s what I meant to say. You’re actually the one who’s wrong. 
7. I’m just a girl, let me say I’m locking in but never actually lock in. Sometimes, I just need a little more time to talk and not do homework, so don’t remind me that I said I was going to lock in. I’ll get there eventually. 
8. I’m just a girl, let me have a high screen time. First of all, why do you care what my screen time is? Are you my optometrist? Let me stare at the little box of light and smile. It’s better than a lobotomy. 
9. I’m just a girl, let me tell you the same story twice. If I start telling you a story you’ve already heard, don’t tell me. I’m about to tell you something either really funny or really brilliant, and you should be lucky to hear it twice. You actually should’ve taken notes the first time, so I’m doing you a favor.
10. I’m just a girl, literally just let me live. Don’t question me. Don’t suggest anything. For this one month, just trust that I know what I’m doing. And, if I don’t, let me make the mistake. It’s better for the plot, anyway.