The Wisecat
October 24, 2006
Dear Tina,
Homecoming Weekend was a time for romance, a time for the love that we let go. ‘Nova girls and guys swarmed the alums, wondering if their past flings with them would recur. As the weekend went on, I found myself wondering, was my fling even worth the rehash? I mean, we were friends for so long, why mess that up? Then, I started thinking: Why do boys get scared when it comes to feelings? Why is it that they flock to the unknown, people they barely know?
Sincerely,Can’t This Be Easy?
Dear Can’t This Be Easy,
Would you turn back the clocks? Would you refuse to let time pass you by? Who knows? The hourglass is running out of sand, and you, my friend, are just sitting there watching it. Sure, he knew how you felt during the fling, but why didn’t you tell him how you felt this time? Were you scared of rejection? I mean, who isn’t these days? For those of you who rehashed the feelings, cheers! As for you, I’m not so sure sympathy is what I need to give you.
Okay, so let’s break it down. You clearly enjoy being together; you’re friends. However, why not take another chance? Why is it that girls and guys think that this “dating game” is the end of the world? I mean, I will admit I am the first to be frightened by the first sight of failure, but we are 18-22 years old, and it is time we take charge of our lives.
As for the male in this situation, stop being passive-aggressive. We’re not five years old any more, and this game is not appealing. Life is too short to keep your feelings tucked away in a neat little box as you sit there hoping someone would crack the code. Why does he flock to the unknown? It’s easier. Why take the more complicated path and actually have to think for a minute, a.k.a. be with you? As you said, you have been friends for quite some time now. I am assuming that you know pretty much his every move and vice-versa.
With that being said, he side-stepped you. He travels to the path unknown because he is predictable with you. You know his strengths and weaknesses, and that just scares him. Putting that aside, what would happen if predictability weren’t even a factor and the relationship worked out? Don’t tell me he would have an issue with that too? Success, GASP! If you ask me, the boy is afraid of success. It never hurt anyone to win a little. As for you, you seem to be the same. Now, the next step. He will come around. I know it is hard to hear, but just wait and see. You never know who will come out of their shell when you least expect it. I mean, you might find that you don’t want to be with him. He could just be all wrong.
XOXO,Tina
Dear Tina,
I have a sarcastic personality, which always comes across as flirtatious vibes with the guys that I hang out with. What can I do to make it known that sarcasm is a part of my personality, and I am not trying to lure these boys in?
Sincerely,Sassy Sarcasm
Dear Sassy Sarcasm,
I say maybe ease up on the sarcasm, but not too much because that is what makes you who you are. We don’t want to be going around changing our personalities so we can accommodate others, now do we? Let the sass out and be proud.
I mean, to be honest, who wants to be in a dull conversation? Sarcasm at least spices up the atmosphere a little bit. Let it be known: if the boy doesn’t enjoy these so called “mixed messages” he thinks you are sending, then give him the boot and send him on his way. The last thing you need is to be confused. As a “sasser” myself, we must stick together. Without us, life would be flawless, and that’s just no fun.
XOXO,Tina