WARNING: Life is back on track (no more MONO!!), people are going wild and the snow is falling. Now that is an ideal week. Is it just me or does the snow bring out the best in people? The classy folk are what I am talking about here (read on for details). Anyway, keep causing trouble, ‘Nova. Oh, and just remember, it’s funny because I said it. Keep it on the TL! XOXO, ‘Nova’s fav gossip gal!

“I’m talking about the classiest girls on campus!”I mean come on, anybody who is anybody would have hung out with these girls on Valentine’s Day because, hell they know how to throw a party! Well, at least in my opinion. So back to the point, Friday night was when life started for 28 pledge sisters. An unofficial sorority party night was the event, location: a wild Conshy establishment and the sorority obvi undisclosed! I mean, please, do you think I am going to call them out … the new members are prob already embarrassed. On to the juicy stuff … literally. The new members (NMs) packed in at about 11ish and mingling ensued. The girls chatted about being new members and how they loved their new family. All of a sudden, the girls noticed two males in the room. “Wait, I thought this was a sorority event; we left our boys at home,” said one girl slightly disappointed but not terribly hating the idea. As the NMs looked closer, it was like an all-girl high school-goer’s dream. Two strippers, one a pizza man (randam-o, I know!) and the other a more traditional policeman, soon asked if anyone ordered pizza or, of course, needed to be “arrested.” Whoa! Possibly a little sexual? Obvi! Let’s just say there was a lot of flexibility happening with these professionals. Online sources showed me that there was whipped cream involved on bare skin. Oh, and how could I forget, clearly there were a lot of top shelf drinks! It would be quite appropriate to say that this night could be called the classiest yet inappro night ever! Fabulous job girls!”To the porch or not to the porch”Okay, the seniors have done it once again, or should I say so has a freshman? Last weekend, there was an off-campus party at a senior house. The party was getting a little out of control, and drinks were constantly being poured. Finally, the night ended and everyone safely left the location – well, not everyone I suppose you could say. All I have to report is that the party hostess went outside the next day and when she was leaving her house she saw two people on her front porch who she did not know! Not only was she startled, but so were the boy and girl. They were only half-clothed. For the time being, let’s just say you can fill in the blanks with your imagination. The host was appalled and quickly shooed them out.”Short Shorts” •Dirty water?! A south campus residence hall is experiencing sink problems. Early one morning, female inhabitants went to complete their normal routine and instead of actual water coming out of the faucet, dark liquid came out of the sink. Can someone please handle this?!