Horoscopes

Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)

Let love come to you. Don’t stalk it.

Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

You will have a Valentine this year, but the stars can’t promise that it won’t be your mom.

Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Try not to be too mortified when you get a singing Valentine on Friday.

Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Love is in the air, and you feel the need to book your wedding at the St. Thomas of Villanova Church. But the stars think that you should find a significant other first.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

It’s never too early to give your significant other a nickname. The stars recommend animal-themed ones.

Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

Don’t get discouraged on Valentine’s Day and join an online dating service. The stars think there are better options.

Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

Be careful what you wish for, single ladies. He might just “put a ring on it.”

Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)

Keep an open mind. That nerd in your ACS class might actually be your soulmate.

Aries (March 21-April 19)

Contrary to popular belief, you do not have to have a significant other to enjoy Valentine’s Day. Celebrate your individualism.

Taurus (April 20-May 20)

If the recession has had a negative impact on your finances, save money by breaking up with your significant other before Valentine’s Day.

Gemini (May 21-June 21)

Forego the traditional romantic comedies and spend the night watching romance-killers “Revolutionary Road” and “My Bloody Valentine 3D.”

Cancer (June 22-July 22)

The stars predict that your sweetheart will enjoy your gift of a mixtape on Saturday. No one takes the time to record music from the radio to a cassette tape anymore.